Stolen Flowers
by Zoete9
Summary: "Sometimes I steal flowers from your garden on my way to the cemetery, but today you've caught me and have demanded to come with me to make sure the "girl is pretty enough to warrant flower theft" and I'm trying to figure out how to break it to you that we're on our way to a graveyard" ZoLu AU


**Author's Note:**

 **I have had this sitting in my docs folder for MONTHS, so I'm finally just putting it out there. This came from awfulAUs on tumblr, if I remember correctly.**

* * *

"You're going to visit Kuina again, aren't you?"

Zoro merely grunts at him from across the bar in response to the question. Sanji takes it as an affirmation and continues his interrogation, absentmindedly cleaning the shot glass in his hand with a damp towel.

"And you're also going to steal from that random dude's garden again, aren't you?"

This time, Zoro sighs and hangs his head in what Sanji interprets as shame when he snaps, "I prefer to call it borrowing."

"Whatever lets you sleep at night – but he probably thinks you're really fucking weird," Sanji comments with a sly smirk.

Zoro snorts and rolls his eyes. "He's never seen me there."

"Well, I hate to break it to you," Sanji says wryly, "but I'm sure he's noticed that half of his flowers have been fucking stolen. Unless he thinks they've mysteriously disappeared into the void."

At that, Zoro almost feels defensive on behalf of the person he's never met but consistently commits flower-theft against. "My point still stands, dipshit! He doesn't know that I'm the one taking his damn flowers, so – so you can just shut the hell up!"

"Jesus. Don't get your panties in a twist."

The remark makes Zoro glare at him, and Sanji realizes that the man might just try to jump over the bar to deck him and he definitely cannot have that. The last thing he needs is scuff marks and blood all over the glossy mahogany he hosts his business upon. Therefore, he must at least try to soothe his suddenly hysterical friend. For the sake of the mahogany.

"Look," Sanji begins, "I'm just saying that you should be prepared for some shit to go down when he finally looks out the window and sees you kidnapping things from his front yard."

Zoro doesn't look like he wants to hit him anymore, at least, when he counters, "That won't happen. I'm careful about it."

"This wouldn't even be a problem if you weren't so cheap and actually bought some from a fucking store like everyone else."

Zoro rolls his eyes again. "Yeah, yeah… I'm tired of both your face and this conversation. See you tomorrow."

Just before Zoro disappears through the door, Sanji calls out, "Don't say I didn't warn you!"

Sanji sets down the glass he's been idly cleaning ever since Zoro came in. He can't wait to say I told you so.

* * *

Zoro scowls at the sidewalk. That idiot bartender knows absolutely nothing. It's not like Zoro's going to tell him that he doesn't go to the store simply because he can never find his way to the cemetery from there. Sanji will just make fun of his lack of directional skills again, which he really doesn't need to hear when that's all he ever hears from everyone else.

Zoro looks up when he realizes where he's automatically stopped: that goddamn house he robs flowers from on a regular basis. He sighs and reminds himself that it's merely for convenience as he sneakily (or as sneakily as one can in the middle of an empty sidewalk in broad daylight) bends down and rips a couple flowers out by their stems. Zoro looks around warily, then realizes what he's doing and mentally slaps himself. That conversation with Sanji has made him paranoid; nothing out of the ordinary has happened, and he's just being stupid.

As soon as he stands up, however, something hits him right in the middle of his forehead. It doesn't hurt, but it does startle him into frantically looking around again.

"Busted!" a voice shouts and, to Zoro's horror, it comes from the direction of the house.

"Fuck," he mutters, feeling very much like a deer in headlights.

There, in the doorway, stands a man around Zoro's own age. His black hair is tousled, red vest shamelessly open, dark eyes wild as his hair. Zoro's brain fizzles as a set of toned abs are (probably unintentionally) flaunted at him – but, wait a damn second. Is that a Nerf gun? Puzzled, Zoro looks for whatever hit him, and sees the trademark cylinder of blue Styrofoam, no bigger than his finger, with an orange suction cup on the end. It lies innocently on the cement, and Zoro picks it up with the hand not already holding the flowers.

"Really?" he asks, disbelieving, holding the harmless bullet up between two fingers. "Did you seriously just shoot me with a Nerf gun?"

The stranger doesn't answer Zoro, but he narrows his dark eyes and reloads, shooting Zoro three more times in quick succession. Zoro even doesn't try to dodge, just stands there and frowns as the Styrofoam hits him deftly on the chest.

"I'll take that as a very enthusiastic yes."

The plastic gun clatters to the floor as the victim of his flower-thieving ways leaves the doorway to close the distance between them. They stand in awkward silence, staring at each other – the latter part of which Zoro has no problem with, but he still wishes to be rid of this awful tension. Goddammit. Sanji was right, he is so not prepared for this confrontation.

"Well," Shockingly Attractive Stranger Guy says, moving his arm in a sweeping motion and gesturing down the street. "Let's go."

Zoro blinks confusedly, because what the hell? "Go where?"

Hopefully he doesn't mean to someplace that no one will hear Zoro scream when he kills him and hides his body in a ditch. It sounds kind of harsh for the crime of flower-napping, but how the hell can Zoro know that this guy won't go overboard with his punishment?

"To see her," said man answers, like this fact is extremely obvious.

Zoro's eyes widen. They can't possibly be talking about Kuina. "What? Why? I don't even know your name!"

"It's Luffy," the now named stranger replies, grin big and bright and unlike anything Zoro's ever seen.

"I'm Zoro," he offers up, figuring he should at least return the favor. Well, that, and Luffy's smile doesn't exactly scream 'I'm going to kill you and no one will ever know'.

"Great!" Luffy says, enthusiastic yet dismissive, then turns around and starts marching off. "Now let's go."

"Wait!" Zoro quickly grabs Luffy by the shoulder to stop him. "I still don't get it. What're you– Why do you want to… go see her?"

Luffy rolls his eyes, but it doesn't seem condescending, like he's trying to make Zoro feel dumb for not understanding, which is definitely a nice change. Zoro lets himself be tugged down the sidewalk, wrist warm where Luffy's clutching it.

His new acquaintance explains as they walk. "I have a right to meet the girl you think is pretty enough to steal flowers for, don't I? I mean, they're my flowers… wait, should I take the fact that you took them as a compliment? Like, are my gardening skills that awesome or–"

Luffy keeps rambling about this and that and some other thing, but Zoro's still stuck on the first sentence, particularly "meet the girl" because that's – it's just not possible. At least not anymore.

How the fuck is he supposed to break it to Luffy that they're walking towards a graveyard, to meet someone who is very much not alive?

Sanji would be laughing at his sorry ass so hard right now that he'd probably fall into traffic and get hit by a bus. What a wonderful thought, Zoro sighs to himself, but then he looks up and his thoughts quickly start tripping over themselves, because the gates of the cemetery are just ahead now.

Luffy's no longer leading Zoro around, but he's still… Zoro feels his stomach curl and his chest tighten, his grip on the flowers becoming harmful. Holy fuck, they're holding hands; they've probably been holding hands this entire time and he just hadn't noticed until now.

Zoro doesn't give himself away by staring at their linked fingers too long, but he does begin to wonder why Luffy would do this if he thinks they're going to see some chick Zoro's dating. Maybe Luffy just hasn't noticed it yet. Zoro shrugs and smirks to himself, significantly less freaked out now that he's wrapped his head around the fact that he's enjoying holding Luffy's hand. He's certainly not going to be the first to let go, when Luffy finally realizes what's going on. And, in the meantime, he's going to use it to his advantage.

With that thought in mind, Zoro takes a deep breath and abruptly stops right in front of the cemetery gates. Luffy, who obviously thought they'd be going further down the road, walks until their joined hands send him stumbling back to Zoro's side with a sharp jerk.

"Zoro!" he scolds, then takes a puzzled look around. "Hey, why'd we stop?"

"You want to meet her, don't you?"

Luffy nods. "Yeah, but–"

"Right. Come on," Zoro mutters, then all but drags a bewildered Luffy through the rows of tombstones. His feet practically zip down them on auto-pilot. He eventually stops at a particularly familiar block of grey, Luffy bumping into his side at the suddenness of their arrival.

"Zoro?" Luffy inquires, voice gone strangely small. "What're we doing here?"

"Luffy… meet Kuina," Zoro introduces, waving a vague hand at the tombstone before crossing his arms and refusing to look Luffy in the eye.

"Hey there, Kuina," Luffy starts speaking after a moment of silence, and Zoro's neck snaps up to stare at this– this near-stranger in disbelief as he goes on, like he's talking to an old friend. "You should know that I've been giving you flowers almost every day this past month. I mean, I didn't exactly know, and they were actually stolen by this idiot friend of yours, but that's not important. I'm okay with it, because I already shot him and Zoro seems cool. We're gonna be great friends if he stops ruining my garden. He thinks you're pretty enough to rob flowers for, by the way."

Luffy whispers the last part like it's a secret, and Zoro feels that part of him Kuina took with her when she died ache again, for the first time in a while, because yeah, Kuina was pretty enough to warrant flower theft. Zoro swallows the lump in the back of his throat and lays the stolen flowers down on the grass. He really hopes he and Luffy can be friends, too. Hell, more than friends, if Zoro's lucky. It'd be pretty great to have Luffy just… hold his hand whenever possible. Not that Zoro will say either of these things to Luffy's face, of course. Ever.

When Luffy turns to smile at him, though, with that grin that steals his breath away like Zoro steals flowers, he suspects that he won't have to.

"Thank you," he says, instead, and it feels like a beginning.


End file.
